software engineering

"Gentlemen, I would rather believe that two Yankee professors would lie than believe that stones fall from heaven." 

"Crap... Someone knocked over my recycle bin... There's icons all over my desktop..." 
"Relax, its only ONES and ZEROS !"

just 0s & 1s

"If it's there and you can see it — it's real.
If it's not there and you can see it — it's virtual.
If it's there and you can't see it — it's transparent.
If it's not there and you can't see it — you erased it !"

"Back up my hard disk ? I can't find the reverse switch !"

"I have NOT lost my mind — I have it backed up on tape somewhere."

"'INSERT DISK THREE' ? But I can only get two in the drive !"

"Daddy, why doesn't this magnet pick up this floppy disk ?"

"Daddy, what does FORMATTING DRIVE C mean ?"

"See daddy ? All the keys are in alphabetical order now."

"Worth noting: running 'reboot -h' does NOT produce a helpful usage message."

"If you can't beat your computer at chess, do what I did — try kick-boxing."